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Parenting: an Example of Grace

If there’s one surefire way to bring sin to the surface and show me who I really am, it’s being a parent. Nothing shines a huge spotlight on my selfishness like a kid crying in the night. I always thought I was a fairly patient person—up until the time when none of my kids are doing the right thing, and all of my kids are refusing to listen. It’s been said that kids are like mirrors: they show you who you truly are by reflecting your less desirable mannerisms back at you, but also by revealing what’s being drawn out of your heart in your reactions. My behaviour in those moments is also an indictment of just how nonchalant I can be towards sin because every instance of being sent to time-out is a chance to share the gospel—to discuss how we all do things that don’t please God and how we all need repentance and grace—and too often tiredness or forgetfulness just maks sure they say a quick apology to their hurt sibling before we all move on. Discipleship opportunity, gone.

We often pray (or, we should) for God to forgive us our sins, keep us from sin, and even to reveal our sins so that we can repent of them and be made clean. The truth is that that last one is a killer, and we all wish God would find a kinder, gentler way to bring our sin to the surface. Why? Because sanctification is H-A-R-D, sin is ugly, and dealing with it is painful. At the same time, we know that if we don’t kill it, then it will kill us. It sounds hopeless, if not for the gracious work of God on our behalf. At the end of the book of Romans, Paul concludes his letter about overcoming sin and walking in ‘the obedience of faith’ by reminding the church in Rome that while sin is a great enemy, God has secured the final victory for us through the death and resurrection of Christ. We know that it is through the power of Christ’s victory that we can resist temptation, put sin to death, and be steadily changed away from sin’s corruption and into Christ’s sanctification.

So, how do I respond to that news today?

First, it drives me to worship

When I spend any time at all thinking on everything that Christ has done in order to save a broken, corrupted person like me my heart overflows with thanks and worship. But as necessary as worship is in our response—and as worthy as Christ is of every millisecond of it—Paul tells me that there’s more to worship than singing or whispering prayers of gratitude. Romans 12 exhorts me to offer my entire life as an act of worship; every thought, word, and deed. So when I find a thought, word, or deed that doesn’t worship him, I need to kill it first and ask questions later. Worship includes working out my salvation—Paul’s ‘obedience of faith’—by actively removing those attitudes and behaviours that don’t demonstrate Christlikeness. Worship isn’t passive, it includes work too.

Second, it calls me to community

John contrasts God and sin by using the imagery of light and darkness. God is light, and sin hates the light. Here’s how John puts it:

5This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. 6If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. 7But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. 8If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 10If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.
(1 John 1:5-10, ESV)

God isn’t simply saving individuals, then in isolation preparing them for heaven. Rather the natural result of being brought ‘into the light’ is that we now live in the community of the body of Christ. The New Testament has at least 40 passages that contain the words “one another” like this one in James 5:16 “confess your sins to one another and pray for one another that you may be healed”. A big part of sin keeping us in darkness is the lie that tells us we can deal with sin on our own. But the Bible teaches us that having fellowship (read mutual accountability against sin) with one another is a critical means of killing sin. There is a deeper love to be found in the Christian community.

Third, it demands genuine example

If there is one thing we all know about kids, it’s that they are quick to call us out when our walk doesn’t match our talk. In those moments when daddy loses his cool and responds in a way which is disproportionately harsh; or he lets things slide for too long before stepping in with discipline, these are the times to better model everything we’ve just mentioned. Dealing with sin begins with me, and if I’ve got anything to improve it’s being quicker to admit sin, ask forgiveness, and celebrate grace. These are the opportunities for deliberate discipleship where I not only have the responsibility to share with my kids the gospel of grace, but I have the equally great responsibility to model for them the gracious God.

 

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Published inChristian Living